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In Short

Grieving With Google Street View

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This article in , a collaboration among , , and .

My hometown is three time zones and at least two flights away, so I don鈥檛 make it back as much as I鈥檇 like to. Whenever I鈥檓 feeling a bit homesick, I open Google Maps. In the bottom right corner, there鈥檚 a tiny yellow stick-person icon, and when I drop it onto the neighborhood where I grew up, it shows me the photos Google鈥檚 Street View car captured when it drove through in 2014 and 2015. After a quick peek at my parents鈥 lawn tchotchkes, I can click my way toward my old haunts: friends鈥 houses, restaurants, my high school, the church basement where my friends used to play pop-punk shows. Sometimes I see a car I recognize, or if Google has assigned a car to drive through more than once, I can watch how a tree grew over the past decade.

I used to think that using Street View in this way was my little secret, but I鈥檓 far from the only sentimental person who travels through time and space using Google. One Twitter user recently posted that her family to her grandpa when he died a few years ago, but when she visited her grandpa鈥檚 farm through Street View, there he was, sitting at the end of the road. Thousands of people responded, many with their own stories of finding old Street View shots of their dearly departed grandmas reclining in their front yards or their grandpas getting into their trucks.

Those who participated in the Twitter thread are just the latest people to share their serendipitous Street View experiences. Five years ago, Matthew J.X. Malady wrote about discovering how Street View captured his since-deceased mother walking to her front door, groceries in hand. In , he describes the strange confluence of emotions he felt: 鈥渏oy,鈥 鈥渄eep, deep sadness,鈥 鈥渉eartbreak and hurt, curiosity and wonder, and everything, seemingly, in between.鈥 When I spoke to him recently, Malady said he isn鈥檛 religious but seeing his mother was a spiritual moment for him. 鈥淚t was almost as if I could be like, 鈥楳om, if you鈥檙e around, make the light switch on and off,鈥 鈥 he told me. 鈥淲hen this kind of thing happens to you, you鈥檙e like: 鈥楾his is a fucking miracle. This was meant to happen.鈥 鈥

And who among us has not thought of a strange coincidence as conveying meaning? Just the other day, I had a dream about an old friend I hadn鈥檛 talked to in years, and woke up to an email from him. I knew it was impossible that we鈥檇 made some psychic connection, but I couldn鈥檛 help but feel that there was some force that could explain both mundane events. It鈥檚 all a trick of the mind; there have been plenty of times I鈥檝e dreamt about a friend without receiving an email from them the next day, yet I ascribe no meaning to those instances. The human brain is primed to find patterns and connections between things, and mine invented a link between that dream and that email. Plus, personality traits like having a high need for control (hello!) or being prone to magical thinking are associated with a greater propensity for , and there鈥檚 also evidence that people are generally more likely to do this if they鈥檙e feeling an extreme emotion, like or great happiness.

And it鈥檚 true that seeing someone you know on Street View is extremely unlikely. Most of the world has only been mapped by Google once, if at all, since Street View was introduced in 2007. Quickly developing urban areas tend to see more updates: University Street by Stanford, a few miles from Google鈥檚 California headquarters, has had 16 updates, whereas Beaverlick, Kentucky, has only been visited by a Street View car once, in May 2018. There鈥檚 an infinitesimally small chance that someone you loved was at the exact right spot at the very moment someone drove by in a Street View car and snapped a photo. 鈥淚f you鈥檙e really close to someone, you have a sense that you鈥檙e mostly aware of all the images that exist of that person,鈥 Malady says, so it can be a strange sensation to discover that a stranger in a camera car created an image that has existed for weeks or years without your knowledge, one viewable by anyone with an internet connection. I swapped some messages with Twitter user @sanitykillsx, who saw her late grandpa sitting in front of his house the one time the Google Street View car came through the town of Las Aguilillas in Jalisco, Mexico, in September 2013. 鈥淚t鈥檚 amazing to see him again and again on there and to share it with my family,鈥 she told me. 鈥淟ike it鈥檚 something funny to see him where everyone else can without other people knowing who he is. That鈥檚 the beauty of it.鈥

What does it mean if the internet has written over your cherished old memories?

As Google visits and revisits neighborhoods, these strange coincidences will only become more likely. (Street View keeps , if you鈥檙e curious whether it might capture someone you know and love.) When Malady wrote about seeing his mom on Street View in 2015, he, too, thought he was the only one who visited his old neighborhood through Google Maps, but he was surprised at the number of readers who wrote to him following the publication of his piece saying they had also encountered a loved one while virtually strolling their hometowns. Now, people might even make these discoveries before the loved ones pass, making Street View a way to return to the way things were. Thomas Wayman first saw a photo of his two dogs playing in a park near his home in Conway, South Carolina, about four years ago; since then, they鈥檝e both died, and he says he鈥檚 often gone back to visit the scene. 鈥淓ver since they passed, I cry every time I see it,鈥 he told me. According to Wayman, the initial photo was captured in 2012 and hasn鈥檛 been updated by Google.

But as places get updated, those coincidences could also be replaced by newer photos. (Luckily, Google keeps all previous shots鈥攂efore Malady knew this, he took screenshots of his mom.) That hasn鈥檛 happened to anyone I spoke with, but I know I would read into the replacement of my loved one鈥檚 photo as another kind of 鈥渟ign,鈥 accompanied by a new wave of emotions and reflection. What does it mean if the internet has written over your cherished old memories?

I asked Malady whether he鈥檚 gone back and looked to see his mom鈥檚 still there, and he said while he鈥檚 looked at his Street View screenshots, he actually hasn鈥檛 looked on Google Maps for her. 鈥淜nowing myself and how I think, I really believe that I haven鈥檛 gone back and looked to see if they鈥檝e been updated because I don鈥檛 want to envision another image being in its place,鈥 he says. 鈥淚t鈥檚 not just random that I haven鈥檛 done it.鈥

While talking with Malady, I suddenly remembered a Street View location I鈥檝e been not-so-randomly avoiding checking on. It鈥檚 not a loved one, per se, but a place that was dear to me that I know no longer exists. Years ago, I lived in suburban California, next to a small farm run by a friendly man we called Papa Ramirez. In the spring, he鈥檇 invite our dog to tear through his cornfields to scare away crows; in the summers, I鈥檇 admire his hulking sunflowers and buy boxes of fresh tomatoes on my way home from work. After I moved away, I heard developers bought the land and were planning to build a 670-unit condo complex. I was back in the area last year but refused to drive past the old farm. I figured that as long as I never saw those awful condos, the farm still lived on, if only in my mind.

Curiosity got the best of me, and I clicked over to the farm, now a mess of orange cones and 鈥渧ideo surveillance鈥 signage surrounding the construction zone. But Google鈥檚 photos from 2011 show the farm I loved: its handwritten signs, a couple approaching the farm stand, someone working in the rows by the front, where they grew carrots. I am at once grateful to Google for the memories as well as amused that the company contributed to the demise of this farm in a distant-but-not-insignificant way: As more tech workers flood the Bay Area, people are now looking at my old neighborhood as a reasonable balance between commute distance and housing prices.

Malady, too, has his reservations about the tech giant, but says that Street View has been a force of positivity for him. 鈥淭his is something in my life that has really made my life appreciably better and more interesting,鈥 he says, even as it鈥檚 brought up tough feelings after his mother鈥檚 passing. 鈥淚 wouldn鈥檛 trade that for anything, and I鈥檓 super happy that all these other people are getting to have that experience.鈥

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Grieving With Google Street View