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Is your brain doing too much? You’re not alone.

• Are you lying awake at night, stressing about money and how your family will get by?
• Did you spend your afternoon hunting for the perfect summer camp—months before school’s even out?
• Are you the one who always remembers doctor’s appointments, birthdays, and when to feed the dog?

If so, you’re carrying something called the mental load—all the thinking, planning, and worrying that comes with taking care of people.

University of Melbourne sociologist Leah Ruppanner and I dive into this combination of emotional and cognitive work, known as “,” in a five-part podcast series. We dissect its meaning, who carries it, and whose responsibility it is—individuals, families, organizations, or governments.

It’s an invisible burden that never really ends because it is tied to caring for ourselves and our loved ones. And it’s a burden which continues to fall disproportionately on women–a reality I recently wrote about in ������Ƶ's The Thread.

So what do we do about it?

We tackle this question head on, in this pop-up podcast series, part of Ruppanner’s the MissPerceived Podcast. To answer it, we spoke about our own research and attempts to "lighten our loads," and interviewed the innovators trying to make headway on this critical issue.

Episode One:

The mental load isn’t just about managing household tasks and mental to-do lists —it’s about carrying the weight of everything happening around us. From the rise of AI to the cost-of-living crisis and threats to democracy, our cognitive and emotional burdens are shifting in ways we’re only beginning to understand.

In this episode, Leah Ruppanner and Haley Swenson from ������Ƶ's Better Life Lab dive into the meaning of "mental load," who carries it, and whose responsibility it is—individuals, families, organizations, or governments. We also explore how partners share (or don’t share) the load and what solutions exist for a more balanced future.

Episode Two:

Leah Ruppanner and Haley Swenson are joined by Eve Rodsky, author of Fair Play and a member of Better Life Lab's Advisory Council, to reframe how we understand the mental load. They explore how men and women conceptualise invisible labour, the systems that uphold these imbalances, and how boundaries and communication can essential to creating more equitable and fair partnerships. Eve shares real-life stories of couples negotiating their mental loads using the Fair Play system—not just as a way to split tasks, but as a tool for reimagining fairness at home.

Episode Three:

In this episode, Leah Ruppanner and Haley Swenson chat with Avni Patel Thompson, founder of Milo & Verity Tuck and co-founder of Goldee AI, about how technology can help lighten the mental load of parents. Avni and Verity share how AI and language modeling are streamlining day-to-day tasks, easing the mental burden, and letting parents breathe a little easier. Tune in for real-life stories and practical insights on using tech to help share the load and make parenting a little bit easier!

Episode Four:

What does the mental load look like for women with intersectional identities, especially migrant mothers from Southeast Asia? In this episode, Leah Ruppanner and Haley Swenson are joined by Mira Gunawansa to dive into her groundbreaking PhD research exploring how the mental load manifests for women of colour and how their unique experiences—navigating visas, cultural assimilation, familial expectations, and racism—are often overlooked in current literature. How are the solutions for these women different and how can we better account for this in the research? Tune in for an eye-opening discussion on how intersectionality shapes the mental load and how we can rethink support for diverse groups of women.

Episode Five:

Haley Swenson (Better Life Lab, ������Ƶ) takes over the mic to interview Leah Ruppanner on the invisible weight of the mental load and her upcoming book Drained. How is the mental load talked about in academia versus everyday life? What does the data reveal—and what are we still missing? They unpack why language matters, how gender shapes the conversation, and what real solutions might look like.